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Mental illness lies to us about isolation

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Hi, my name is Carla, I’m 46, I’m a podcaster, I have 2 dogs…and I have chronic primary and secondary depression and anxiety. What I mean by this is that I have them as stand-alone diagnoses, then have them compounded as both symptoms of, and then also natural consequences of, my chronic illnesses of EDS, fibro, and POTS. Triple whammy. I also have some PTSD issues even now from the assault I described and unpacked in episode 34, “This Girl Just Had a Bad Date”. Depression and anxiety (and PTSD) are liars, and one of the most insidious lies is that you are alone in this pain, and that you are alone in this—inability to cope? Inability to bootstrap yourself? Inability to YOLO? So I made a list in my #commonplacebook, which goes with me everywhere, of successful, “happy” people who do or have struggled with mental illness, often multiple disorders, like me. A couple of them, like @ladygaga, are also chronically ill like I am. Now, next time depression or anxiety tries to tell me I am all alone or desperate, I have receipts. I hope this list helps someone else, too. Add me to the list, and add yourself to the list. As Rumi said, we’re all just walking one another home. I will put a picture of the full list on theremightbecupcakes.com. #depression #anxiety #mentalhealth #strength #bujo #bulletjournal #neveralone #horrorpodcast #truecrimepodcast #bookpodcast #literaturepodcast @braintrustfm #chronicillnesspodcast #chronicpainpodcast #spooniepodcast #spooniepodcaster #zebrapodcaster #zebrapodcast #braintrustnetwork #cursiveismagic #chronicpain #chronicillness #PTSD #beyourownheroine

A post shared by There Might Be Cupcakes (@theremightbecupcakes) on

full image of spread:

 

Quote I referred to in the Instagram description:

We are all just walking each other home.

Rumi

Recommended reading:

Stitches: A Handbook on Meaning, Hope and Repair by Anne Lamott

Prozac Diary by Lauren Slater

my Goodreads chronic illness bookshelf (to be read and read)

These books added to the podcast’s bookshelf on Goodreads | please feel free to add me as a friend on Goodreads

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Book Lists: Chronic Illness

Listopia on Goodreads:

my chronic illness Goodreads bookshelf

Bumped to the top of my to-be-read list from these two Listopia/Goodreads lists:

Do you have any recommendations or additions?

the podcast’s bookshelf

please feel free to add me as a friend on Goodreads

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Ask Me Anything

Ask me a question about being disabled. Suggest a topic for the podcast. Recommend a book, or ask me to recommend a book. Ask away by filling out this form, which will email me, or by calling my Google Voice. Leave me a message with your question or record a nice message to be played on the podcast: 434-214-0873!

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Episode 19 Teaser

Lovelies, I am sorry, but I am not going to be recording and publishing until tomorrow. I almost had a syncope (POTS fainting) episode today–luckily thwarted by last week’s ER doc’s medical advice, but even “almost” tears my body up.

But it’s going to be a good one, and since I am late, I will go ahead and spill:

It’s all about the eclipse, folklore about eclipses, and all tied into The Eclipse: The King Eclipse that empowered and psychically connected Jessie Burlingame (Gerald’s Game) and Dolores Clairborne.

To get you excited and tide you over, here’s the trailer for the amazing adaption of Dolores Claiborne, starring my friend in my head Kathy Bates and Jennifer Jason Leigh. Enjoy, and I will see you tomorrow.

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Episode 15: Old School Brownies

This entry is part 1 of 2 in the series Girl Scouting

The Scottish Brownie, from Scottish Fairy and Folk Tales, by George Douglas, 1901:

The Scottish Brownie formed a class of beings distinct in habit and disposition from the freakish and mischievous elves. He was meagre, shaggy, and wild in his appearance.

In the daytime he lurked in remote recesses of the old houses which he delighted to haunt; and in the night sedulously employed himself in discharging any laborious task which he thought might be acceptable to the family to whose service he had devoted himself. But the Brownie does not drudge from the hope of recompense. On the contrary, so delicate is his attachment that the offer of reward, but particularly of food, infallibly occasions his disappearance for ever.

Translation: leave the damn bowl of milk, honey, or porridge for your resident helpful household deity. Thank your brownie. Or…

It is told of a Brownie, who haunted a Border family now extinct, that the lady having fallen unexpectedly in labour, and the servant, who was ordered to ride to Jedburgh for the sage-femme, showing no great alertness in setting out, the familiar spirit slipt on the great-coat of the lingering domestic, rode to the town on the laird’s best horse, and returned with the midwife en croupe. During the short space of his absence, the Tweed, which they must necessarily ford, rose to a dangerous height. Brownie, who transported his charge with all rapidity, was not to be stopped by this obstacle. He plunged in with the terrified old lady, and landed her in safety where her services were wanted. Having put the horse into the stable (where it was afterwards found in a woful plight), he proceeded to the room of the servant whose duty he had discharged, and, finding him just in the act of drawing on his boots, administered to him a most merciless drubbing with his own horsewhip. Such an important service excited the gratitude of the laird, who, understanding that Brownie had been heard to express a wish to have a green coat, ordered a vestment of that colour to be made and left in his haunts. Brownie took away the green coat, but was never seen more. We may suppose that, tired of his domestic drudgery, he went in his new livery to join the fairies. (source)

He will beat your ass and leave, even if you say you’re sorry and make him a wee coat.

muffinsA sweeter sort, who won’t drub you with your own whip, look like cupcakes, and have veggie power to boot:

Sweet Potato Avocado Brownie Bites

  • sweet potato puree or pumpkin puree
  • avocado
  • eggs
  • honey
  • coconut oil
  • coconut flour
  • cocoa powder
  • baking soda
  • sea salt
  • mini chocolate chips
  • walnuts (optional)

24 mini muffins, gluten-free: Serving size: 1 mini-muffin Calories: 71 Fat: 4g Carbohydrates: 9g Sugar: 7g Sodium: 115mgFiber: 1g Protein: 1g

Hit the link for the full recipe. And make me some.

And, yes, in case you were wondering, the House Elves in the Harry Potter universe are based upon Brownies. God bless Dobby.

For those who were kids at the same time as I: there were two brownies in the movie Willow (1988), Franjean and Rool.

 

Recommended Reading

The Scottish Fairy Book by Elizabeth Grierson

The Lore of Scotland: A Guide to Scottish Legends by Jennifer Westwood and Sophia Kingshill

An Illustrated Treasury of Scottish Folk and Fairy Tales by Theresa Breslin

all added to the podcast’s bookshelf on Goodreads

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There Might Be Cupcakes Podcast

About Me, Myself, and Cupcakes

This is how long I have been working on this podcast.

Hi, I’m Carla. I’m a 47-year-old disabled writer. I live on a mountain in the Appalachian range, in the section known as the Blue Ridge in the state of Virginia, right on the edge of the George Washington National Forest. The latter makes the Missing 411 phenomenon extra spooky.

The official (read: written by me, I’m the only one here) podcast description for There Might Be Cupcakes gives a lot of information about my shenanigans here:

Carla is: a bookdrunkard, a 40-something with psychology and counseling degrees with post-grad work in grief/loss/trauma, sex crimes, and forensic anthropology.

a former freelance journalist and counselor, who is never bored.

a disabled introvert who sees connections everywhere–like John Nash, only less math-y.

a knitting fidget who loves horror movies with a skewed passion.

Like one of her heroes, Harriet the Spy, she wants to learn everything and write in all down (more likely than not in her bullet journal).

Join her (and sometimes her friends) in her strange library as she INFJs everything from unused angles.

It’s going to get weird in the best way. Let’s play.

I try to release episodes about once a week; I release right now as my health allows. I post a website entry for each episode, with more information, photographs, and suggested reading for that particular episode, and the available stream and downloadable MP3 for that episode. I will post additional posts from my Instagram, my Pinterest, and from anything topical that catches my interest and I think might interest you throughout each week.

All social media links:

Come hang out and say hi!

Most Recent Website Entries

WordPress All website entries

Disorders

My disabilities are Ehlers-Danlos, Hypermobility Type, POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome), and fibromyalgia. Basically, the collagen in all twelve systems of my body is damaged, everything hurts all the time, and my blood pressure is not stable with a sudden change in posture (hard sneeze, laughing, standing up). My body is my frenemy.

How to subscribe

Finally…why cupcakes?

My friend, Greg Behrendt, has a comedy routine about how he would do unpleasant things for cake, and that anywhere you go, there might be cake. Well, cupcakes are all that and more: portable, equal, fancier…and so much more. The title represents sharing, hope, whimsy…and here’s Greg’s routine. Enjoy, and always remember there might be cupcakes.

Need to contact me?

Easy peasy: carla@nulltheremightbecupcakes.com

Ask me a question or suggest a book or topic.

Carla Hufstedler

1137 Little Piney Road

Roseland, VA 22967

Google Voice, to speak with me directly or to record a nice message to be played on the podcast: 434-214-0873

How to support me and the podcast

And thank you immensely, just for listening and visiting! I love my listeners, every one. Just your lending me your ears every week makes me so very happy, more than I can express

colophon: All content in podcast and on website not held in copyright by others copyright 2017-2019 Carla Pettigrew Hufstedler. All rights reserved.

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Upcoming Local True Crime: Help Save the Next Girl

This entry is part 1 of 4 in the series Against the Peace and Dignity of the Commonwealth

Along with my usual fare of literature, storytelling, and things that go boo, in the next few weeks and months I am going to be telling some local true crime stories, but in my own unique way, naturally. All will have happened (or be happening) either here, in Virginia, or my home state, North Carolina, and I am sticking to cases that I experienced as a citizen.

To launch this loose series, I give you the first national PSA of Help Save the Next Girl, the amazing educational and empowerment nonprofit founded by Gil Harrington, Morgan Harrington’s mother. I will post this video with its full information and links to Help Save the Next Girl on the website momentarily. Please check HSNG out: they have amazing safety tips that don’t just apply to Virginians or to Americans, and you can start up your own branch–even in your middle school! They have materials designed for different developmental levels, designed not to frighten but to empower.

I posted this information on the Facebook page, along with Help Save the Next Girl’s very first national PSA. Here I’ll post their 2017 PSA, along with their links. Be safe, and keep each other safe.

Help Save the Next Girl

About HSNG/about Morgan Harrington

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